Two thumbs up

I've learned that when I can't talk, thumbs up is the most instinctive way for me to say "yes." An enthusiastic "yes" is two thumbs up and I've been using it a lot today. Funny, I never thought I was a "thumbs up" sort of person.

The laser procedure went extremely well and the doc said the prognosis is very good. He also said I was his favorite patient of the day because it went beautifully and I was so good (good = tough). The biggest surprise of the day was the level of discomfort/pain, including the pain I'm in now. Nothing really bad, but definitely unpleasant. I feel like I just caught a nasty virus. My throat hurts, it hurts to swallow, and my sinuses burn and ache. Other than that, I'm doing very well and plan to detail the whole procedure here tomorrow.

Tom was able to watch the whole event so I can relay not only my experience as patient, but his input as an observer. It was a very interesting experience for both of us. I'll fill you in tomorrow.

Thanks again for all the prayers, thoughts, good wishes, and concerns!

The big day has arrived

I'm having the laser procedure to remove my vocal polyp at 1:00 pm today. I'm a little nervous, but mostly anxious to finally be doing something about this problem. This is the closest I've come to surgery since I had my tonsils removed when I was four or five years old. And if the procedure is successful, I won't have to have surgery on this polyp in the coming months.

Tom is finally home after two months with his parents in Illinois and I'm so grateful to have him here with me now. Of course, he's enjoying being home and I'm sure he is looking forward to 3-4 days of absolute silence from me. That reminds me, I have to grab a steno pad before I leave so I have some means of communication.

I'll post again soon to report on the procedure. Wish me luck!

A silver lining

First of all, I want to thank everyone who emailed or called me with your well wishes. I have been overwhelmed and humbled by your kindness and concern.

It is true that every cloud has a silver lining.

I learned Monday that I am indeed without health insurance. It terminated as of December 1. Great timing, huh? Tom has not been able to get an answer regarding whether we can get COBRA coverage or not because of the buyout of his employer. It looks like I will probably be without insurance until January when Tom goes to work for the new company.

Dr. King's office was ready to schedule the surgery for this week, but I told them I'd have to wait a bit to figure out what to do. Since I didn't know about the insurance problem when I had my exam, I didn't discuss the ramifications of waiting with Dr. King. I also had thought of other questions in the meantime so I arranged for a phone consultation.

He had mentioned when he discovered the polyp that lasers have sometimes been used on polyps. I asked him to elaborate on that comment and he said that because of the size of the polyp it's possible a laser could be used to shrink the blood vessels supplying blood to the polyp. This procedure would be a fraction of the cost of the surgery, and could be done in the office under local anesthesia while I'm awake. No surgical center or anesthesiologist to pay, and no risk of surgical complications like a reaction to the anesthesia or infection. The only risk would be the money for the procedure if it doesn't work. If unsuccessful, I'd still have to have the surgery, but it would be done later after I am healed from the laser procedure and, hopefully, when I have insurance coverage again.

Needless to say, I'm thrilled at this news. I'm not sure when I can schedule the procedure since the laser has to be brought to the facility. I’ll keep you posted as I learn more.

In addition to the laser procedure, I'm also taking a homeopathic remedy supplied to me by homeopath and acupuncturist Joseph Ellerin who is the partner of my friend Galen Williams (founder/owner of the Louisville Clinic of Traditional Chinese Medicine). Perhaps the remedy, combined with all the prayers and healing energy being sent my way, will manifest in a miracle, or at least ensure that the laser procedure is 100% successful.

Mystery solved

I've been experiencing some hoarseness and vocal problems for about two months and was finally able to see an doctor (Dr. King at Boulder Valley ENT) for an endoscopy on Friday. We discovered that I have a polyp on one of my vocal cords. It's small, but is unfortunately not something that will disappear with vocal rest. I will have to undergo outpatient surgery to have it removed. At this point, I'm waiting for the doctor's office to schedule the surgery. It's supposed to take place as soon as possible, but I don't know what that means in hospital terms.

Essentially, a vocal polyp is a blood-filled blister. Untreated, it would eventually cause irritation and quite probably a nodule (callous) to form on the opposite cord. It could also enlarge and cause further problems. The surgery involves opening a flap of skin on the polyp, draining it, and closing the flap. Sounds simple, right? It would be if it was on my toe, or just about anywhere else on my body.

Polyps are usually caused by overuse or trauma to the vocal cords (too much talking, singing, or screaming, or singing while sick). While I have certainly abused my voice in the past (singing for 4 hours straight in smokey bars, screaming at concerts, talking over music at parties with friends all night, etc.), I haven't done anything even remotely strenuous in the last few months (or year, for that matter). There is a good chance the polyp may have occurred due to acid reflux, so I'm being treated for that as well. I haven't really had symptoms of it, but apparently, it can often occur without the typical signs of heartburn.

The prognosis for a full recovery is very good. After the surgery, I will have 3-4 days of complete vocal rest and then weeks of voice therapy, gradually speaking a little each day (and I would imagine involving some exercises). I'm unclear at this point exactly how long it will be before I can perform again. Now that I'm over the initial shock, I have more detailed questions to ask Dr. King.

Perhaps more shocking than the diagnoses was the news that I may not have health insurance coverage anymore. Tom is still trying to determine if I'm covered or not. His employer sold the company to another company about the time Tom went to Illinois to help his dad recover from quadruple bypass surgery (he is still there, by the way). His start date at the new company was moved to January and he was told that he would have insurance in the interim, but when he investigated it last week to be sure he discovered that we may have been dropped. When it rains, it pours...

I'll post more information as I get it. In the meantime, I welcome all the crossed fingers, warm thoughts, and prayers you'd care to send my way.

Pantoum who?

Years ago, after winning a poetry award, I decided I should take a poetry class or two and figure out what the heck I was doing. I had come to poetry as an appreciative reader and wrote as such. I wrote poetry like a musician who can't read music, but plays by ear. I obviously had some ability, but no actual knowledge of the art form. The couple classes I took -- one through Colorado Free University and one with Lighthouse Writers -- were very informative and fun. I was challenged to write in styles I didn't even know existed.

To celebrate the season, I thought I'd share one of my assignments. This is the only pantoum I've ever written... so far, anyway. If you don't know what a Pantoum is, see if you can figure out the pattern before you look at the Wikipedia link.

AUTUMNAL PANTOUM
© Trinity Demask

An old friend knocked on my door today,
the screen door thumping in announcement
over the playful, pulsing wind
as it swirled around the house.

The screen door thumping in announcement,
the wind chased its tail
as it swirled around the house
shaking loose the first-browned leaves.

The wind chased its tail
in a cloudless, cobalt sky,
shaking loose the first-browned leaves.
Cool air kissed my cheeks in greeting.

In a cloudless, cobalt sky,
bright against the changing trees,
cool air kissed my cheeks in greeting.
I inhaled deeply of the sweet breath of chimney smoke.

Bright against the changing trees
sunlight streamed in challenged warmth.
I inhaled deeply of the sweet breath of chimney smoke,
and overhead, departing geese chanted good-byes.

Sunlight streamed in challenged warmth
unwilling to relinquish the throne of season
and overhead, departing geese chanted good-byes.
I smiled in remembrance, acknowledging . . .

Unwilling to relinquish the throne of season
the sun blazes despite the crisp arrival.
I smile in remembrance, acknowledging
old friend Autumn knocking on my door.

"Here" used in promotional video for Boulder business

My song "Here" has been used in a video to promote a Boulder consignment store called Clutter. Metroseen is the company behind the video. They promote local businesses through web videos that introduce you to the owners, their stores, and their merchandise. Metroseen supports local musicians by using their music in the video soundtracks. Check out the video for Clutter by clicking here.

Band Names: The Good, the Not Bad, and the Ugly

Once I suffered through finding a band name that adequately communicated the essence of my music, I found I couldn’t shut the search function off in my head. Tom and I are always listening for phrases that would make a statement as a band name and we often come up with some great ones. Often times, these have already been taken by other bands ("The Untold Story") and they are almost always names that have nothing to do with any music we would ever create ("The Improbability Drive") so they are essentially useless to us. But some of them are pretty damn funny ("Gunky Bob & the Flaming Tumbleweeds") so at least we get a laugh out of it in addition to a little brain exercise.

So, today I’m sitting in the van at the gas station and I notice a banner advertising beer. I came up with "Bud Miller and the Brown Bottle Boys." Eh... It’s worth a smile, but that’s about it. Then, I started thinking about Coors (pisswater, Golden, etc.) and stumbled across this, my favorite band name of the week: "Adolph Coors & the Clear Creek Contaminants"

OK, your turn now. Go...